Back in the good old days, before the internet, we had to work for our porn. Sure, if you were lucky, you had a friend with a few dirty magazines, or if you were brave enough and had a VCR (or beta…) you had to slink behind the secret curtain in the back of the video store and rent something. Even then, you still had to face the hottie behind the counter who probably knew a couple of your friends’ friends and the secret would be out and you were then branded insta-perv in your circle of potential some day hook ups.
If you were like me and too broke to afford the super bad ass cable, you could still cheat if you were patient enough and figure out a way to tweak your cable box and get the Playboy Channel.
For a short time, we had one of those push button boxes, similar to the one in the photo. I don’t know what I was doing to figure this out, but accidentally I discovered one night that if I held down two buttons at a time, and tweaked the dial, just right, I had a choice of seeing either a slightly distorted rolling picture with the Playboy Channel with no sound, or if I moved the slider a little more, I had no picture but perfect sound. The trick was though, that you had to hold everything just right. A little sweet spot that wasn’t always there, but you slowly developed the skill on how to hold the right combination. Of course trying to masturbate to it was impossible, but now that I look back at it, it was such work just to see something, or hear it, that it was a real turn on, just seeing that little bit of broken up soft core porno every night for as long as your fingers held out and the sweet spot didn’t go away when the plastic heated up too much.
Ah, yes, Marilyn Chambers, Seka and Shauna Grant still haunt my fondest wet dreams in their distorted silent, rolling greatness. No Hi Def on demand, no thumbnail galleries, no yawning at the vast network of any kind of twisted hardcore shit you could think of at the click of a mouse, no “two chicks one cup”. Just pure, horny, ingenuity, some brief meaningful glimpses at sensual, soft core pornography, and I was grateful for what little I got, dammit! I kind of miss those days.
Just thought I would share.
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